Baby steps

All is good here! Dad's doing really well. He is getting frustrated and irritated, which I take to be a great sign of improvement. It's pretty easy to understand why he's feeling that way:

1. He's had open heart surgery, which multiple sources have informed us "feels like an elephant sat on your chest."

2. He's been stuck lying in a bed for weeks, so he's achy and his muscles are tight and he wants to get up and move around way more than the nurses and doctors will allow.

3. He still has the trach in, which his nurse - who had one in her younger years - called "your best friend and worst enemy." She says it's weirdly uncomfortable, and makes you feel like you have to cough at all times.

4. He can't drink or eat because of the trach. He's getting nutrition and fluid through his G-tube, but still.

5. It's difficult for him to communicate. He can't talk with the trach, unless they put a speaking valve in, which they tried to do yesterday but it was too uncomfortable in his throat. (They'll try again today). We've since discovered that we are all really bad at reading lips. He can write and point to alphabet letters, but his hands are still wobbly and don't always do what he wants them to. (They tell us that this will greatly improve over the next few weeks.)

6. He just wants to go home.

I think it's hard for him to see the amazing improvements that he's making every day: yesterday he could hardly hold the pen, today he could. Two days ago he couldn't make a thumbs-up sign, today he did. And cognitively he really seems to be "all-there." He gets my dumb jokes, he can answer any question the nurses throw at him, his memory is good. He seems like himself. Tempest-tossed, but himself nonetheless.